Hot off the press

The Letter Carrier

Flash Fiction

by Charles McKelvy


“You can’t just sit around the house all day doing nothing. You’ve got to get active. Be productive. Be—“

“But I’m retired. I’m officially old and worthless. I’m past prime. Out to pasture. I’m nobody nobody sent. I’m—“

ENOUGH!!!! Get a part-time job at a box store as a greeter. Get a hobby. Learn to play the guitar. Take an adult ed class. Get active. Do something. Anything.”

The beleaguered old guy considered his wife for a long time, and then he left home without another word.

And when he returned three hours later, he had a brand-new, shiny-red bicycle in the back of his pick-up truck.

“What’s that?!?”

“My new job, hobby, and adult ed class,” he said.


“I’m going to be a letter carrier. Everybody around here drives to the post office, so I’m going to ride around on my new bike and tell them that I can take their mail to the post office, and maybe pick up their mail too if I can work that out, which, I think I can. Anyway, it’ll be good for the environment, and I’ll get a good work-out, and—“

“What are you going to charge?”



That’s right—nothing. But I’ll get plenty in return.”

“Like what?”

“Like I’ll get out of the house and get some exercise, and I’ll get plenty of vitamin D from the sun and social contact and—“

And, try as she might, the wife couldn’t argue with that.



About charleymckelvy

Charles McKelvy lives and writes in southwest Michigan with his wife and fellow writer, Natalie McKelvy. They established the Dunery Press in 1988 in order to publish their own fiction. They continue to do so to this day. Charles McKelvy is an Eagle Scout.
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One Response to Hot off the press

  1. Marcia Irwin says:



    Send by iPad


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